Don't Wake Me
by Six-Calavera
Summary: Jesse was never one for goodbyes, and you hadn't even left him with that... Now he's haunted by his memories, determined to be reunited again.. (Jesse McCree/Reader, suggestive, sexual situations, vague plot, reader insert.)


Jesse is snoring lightly... Sleeping among haphazardly laid out sheets. Blankets barely coil around his bare chest, exposing his skin to the pale moonlight shining through his hotel room window. His soft hair is tousled messily like a warm brown halo, framing his strong features.

He grimaces slightly. An echo of a voice stirs him from his sleep. His breathing quickens, his chest rising and falling at a faster pace. And sweat begins to litter his forehead.

He sees her...the sadness in her eyes before she disappeared forever.

He tosses and turns, unable to wake from his nightmare. His fingers grip the sheets, digging forcefully into the cloth.

"No..." he mumbles in his sleep, "...why...?"

But before his mind can provide an answer, he quickly jolts up, panting erratically. Breaking free of old memories.

He sighs deeply. He runs his fingers through his thick hair, and rubs the sleep from his face.

His torso tenses and coils as his moves to sit at the edge of his bed.

The night is warm. He notices the sweat glistening on his body. It's not that warm...

"Damn...not again." he scolds himself. Another nightmare had left him in cold sweats, unable to rest for a full night.

He never should have gotten involved with someone. What made him think he would have been able to keep her safe?

His fingers curl around the clear glass on his nightstand, throwing his head back he drinks the last of the dark brown liquid. Attempting to further numb himself. Replace her face with whiskey.

He forces himself off of the bed with a grunt. He starts to get his gear back in order. He gets himself dressed, leaving his hat for last.

"Time to keep movin'." he says, to no one in particular.

His spurs clink softly in the night as he walks out of his hotel room. His boots shuffling on wooden floors.

He pulls his wide brim hat down, covering his face from anyone that might be looking.

Out in the cold air, Jesse throws his leg over a motorbike he- borrowed and makes for the next town on his map.

Lights pass overhead. He zips past cars in the night. Eventually the cars turn into carriages. And the lights turn into lanterns. A town stuck in the past. Overlooked and forgotten. If he wanted to run away from the world, this is where he would go.

He kicked up his bike just outside the town's saloon. Dust and dirt instantly sticking to his dark leather boots as he trudged to the front door.

Walking in, he pushed the double doors and all eyes were on him. But to his relief it was only the young ladies eyes who lingered on him for too long. No one recognized him, good.

He took a seat at the bar, quickly paying a man for a room and a drink. His eyes scanned the room for a moment, but he was interrupted by a young woman crashing into him.

She bumped him with her shoulder and glasses and drink spilled over the both of them. Jesse tried to help her, taking her hand in his he helped her steady herself as she shot out a meek, "Sorry."

But before Jesse could even finish his sentence, "That's quite alright, miss. Hey, wai-" she darted off, wrenching her hand from his grasp.

"Hmm?" Jesse hummed, he noticed she left a piece of paper in his hand.

'Did she forget this?' he thought.

He unfolded it and realized it was a message from the woman.

 _Last room on the top floor of the Inn down the road, meet me there. For god's sake, don't let anyone see you. You can't stay here for long. No te olvides, Jesse._

Jesse's heart began to beat furiously in his chest.

'No...it can't be...it can't have been that easy...'

Jesse's head darted up, straining to catch a glimpse of the woman who had left him the message. His face went pale with fear and worry, and yet a pang of gratefulness at having learned spanish interjected between it all.

There was no way he'd stay put now, no need to ask him twice. He had to know.

Shoving the small piece of paper into a pocket hidden underneath his poncho he quickly took his last swig, slamming the glass back down on the counter before nearly breaking into a sprint out of the bar and down the road.

...

Opening the door to the unlocked room he cautiously looked inside, "Hello?"

A voice responded, "Hi, Jesse."

There she was, standing at the window in the pale moonlight. A look of regret on her face.

Elation quickly took over Jesse's features, a wide smile dominating his face.

"Mi amor." he whispered in that thick gringo accent that used to always make her chuckle. Jesse nearly fell to his knees, "Darlin'..." he strode quickly across the room, his arms opened wide to capture her in a crushing embrace, "...I can't believe I found ya."

Her smile was faint, but her arms still curled around his body, slowly banishing the cold air from his clothing. He still smelled of open road and gunpowder, and nostalgia tugged at the memories she had tried to bury.

He gripped her shoulders, reluctantly pulling away to look at her face, "What happened? Where in the hell did you go?"

She stayed silent as his eyes searched through hers, waiting for an answer.

Jesse's brows knitted together in a scowl, shaking his head, "How could you just up and disappear like that? What were you thinkin'?"

"I-" she started, but Jesse wouldn't let her finish.

"Do you have any idea what I went through just to find you? I didn't even know if you were alive or dead. And you just left me to believe I'd never see you again." he continued, exasperated.

Jesse lifted his calloused hands to capture her face. Starting as gentle caress before his fingers tightened around her jaw, causing a low whimper to escape her lips, "Say somethin'. Didn't you care?"

With her head forcefully angled towards his, she finally spoke, "It was all my fault, Jesse..."

His brows twitched, "What? What do ya mean?"

She sighed, "Why do you think they always found us...it was me, Jesse..."

Realization flashed in his eyes, a painful grimace followed by a shuttering breath, "You mean..."

His grip faltered, and his heart was pierced by her betrayal.

"It was always me. I was supposed to distract you. I was to lead them to you. But you were so...slippery. You were good at escaping and kept evading our small team. In the end I stayed too long. I- I just couldn't do it anymore. I'm so sorry, Jesse."

"Shut up."

Her breath wavered, "W- what?"

Jesse grit his teeth, "I don't want to hear any of that."

"But, Jesse. You have to hear this. I have to tell you the truth." She pleaded.

"No, no I don't. You're being selfish and I'm not gonna hear any of it." Jesse clenched his fists, stepping forward until she was pinned between him and the cold wall, "Did you ever love me? Or were you just playing a part?"

"I- ye- yes..." she admitted defeatedly, "I- I loved you...I loved you and I- that's why I had to leave."

His hands slid to the sides of her head, keeping her trapped, "That's all I want to hear..." he brought his lips to her ear, his steady breathing making her quiver, "...that's what I need to hear."

It was a slap to face realizing that she was never in any danger. She never needed him to protect her. To love her. It was him who needed protection. From her.

She swallowed hard, trying not to cry out as his head dipped to plant bites at the curve of her neck, kissing the sure to be bruises after each painful bite.

"Just tell me what I want to hear...I don't want the truth. I want the lies." he breathed.

Her fingers weaved through his soft hair, sad eyes scanned his still figure, "I missed you so much, Jesse. I've thought about you every night since I last saw you."

Jesse hummed, lifting his head to look her in the eyes, his lips hovering just before hers, "Ask me."

She bit her lip, her hands running down his broad chest to rest on his stomach, feeling it rise and fall with every longing breath.

"Kiss me, Jesse." she begged.

Jesse responded with a growl, pushing her forcefully towards the bed to pounce after her, his body pinned hers and he crushed her lips with his own.

She moaned at his sudden possessiveness, "Jesse..."

His hands explored her body, his lips left a fiery trail at her jaw and neck.

"Jesse, we can't." she whimpered.

But he ignored her, gripping his hat and throwing it to the side, tearing away his poncho and plunging back into the crook of her neck.

Her hands tugged at him, halfheartedly attempting to pull him away, "Jesse, please. You can't stay here."

Jesse took a fistful of her hair, pulling her head back forcefully, "Shut up, would ya, darlin'?"

He flashed her a quick smirk before kissing her deeply, successfully shutting her up.

The door creaked open...

And she turned her head, breaking the kiss with a sloppy sound. She seemed to recognize who it was...

Jesse's eyes penetrated her own in a fiery stare, "No..." he begged.

"I'm so sorry, Jesse." she shook her head noncommittally, tears filling her eyes.

"McCree..." a harsh growl came from the doorway.

Jesse turned his head from her red eyes, a floating skull amongst shadows had called to him.

'Not him.'

Looks like It was time to keep running.

He had moved off of the bed, and she had gone to stand near her comrade.

"Tell me you'll come with me." Jesse pleaded, turning to regard her.

She wanted to give him what he wanted. She wanted to say it, more that anything. But they both knew that would be impossible. Why was he torturing himself?

"It would be easier if you would just forget about me, Jesse." she replied.

The shadow interjected, "Well, McCree? What's it going to be? Are you going to make this easy for me? Or will you keep running?"

Jesse's muscles coiled in anticipation. His hand hovered over his gun...fingers twitched and his jaw clenched...

'Run...you can't fight with her so close...and unarmed.'

Jesse growled, ignoring him, "I'm gonna find you again, darlin'. And I won't take no for an answer next time..."

"McCree..." the shadow growled threateningly, fully expecting him to bolt for the door.

But without another thought, McCree gripped his hat to his head, turning quickly and in a flash propelling himself through the closed window behind him. His body collided with the glass, sending it shattering to the ground below. He tucked his legs in close to his torso, hopping over the frame of the window and landing on the terrace outside.

The shadow growled in anger, moving to follow after Jesse, pulling free one of his guns. But before he could pop off a single shot, she grabbed his arm twisting it behind his back.

"Wait!" she yelled. Holding him tight for as long as she could.

He struggled for a moment, "I can't believe you fell for that damned ingrate..." but he was much stronger, and it didn't take long for him to break free, "...I thought you were smarter than that."

He was black smoke. And she could no longer touch him. He flowed to the outside but she heard the roar of an engine riding off into the distance.

The shadow wasn't going to catch him. Not today.

She crumpled to the floor. Unable to do a damn thing, except regret.

"I'm so sorry, Jesse." she whispered to herself.

The shadow's grim voice echoed in her mind. Mocking her.

'Nunca pudiste dejar de mezclar trabajo con placer...isn't that right, nena...?'

...

'You never could keep from mixing business with pleasure...isn't that right, darling...?'


End file.
